My Interracial Marriage & Our Family Together

A wonderful gal from Twin Cities Moms Blog wrote a stellar piece called, I Married an Old Guy, and I loved the whole thing. My situation isn’t exactly the same, but I got this beautiful glimpse into her life and her reality, and in some way, could relate. You see, she has unique circumstances in her family that are different than the “norm” of society. And I do too. I have an interracial marriage. And although there are so many interracial couples and multiracial families in today’s world, its still not necessarily normal. 

My Interracial Marriage & Our Family Together | Twin Cities Moms Blog

I married a black man. The most amazing, incredible and wonderful man. I obviously did not marry him because he was black. I fell in love with him. And although, after nine years of marriage and almost six kids later, I may not feel that INTENSE PASSIONATE HONEYMOON LOVE every single day, I choose to continue to love him. And he the same for me. Because love isn’t just a fleeting feeling, but instead, a choice. And I have interracial couples often contacting me and asking me how do we do it with all the opposition of “mixing races” and pressures of society, and often times my answer is, it’s a choice. If that person is worth it to you, you’ll make the choice to love them and go the distance no matter what stands in your way. 

One of our favorite TV shows is This is Us. Who’s with me? Anyhow, we sat down to watch an episode and it was about how Randall (a black man) was adopted by a white family and his dad goes on a college visit with him to Howard University, which is historically a black university. Upon introducing his dad to his other black friends at the campus, his dad sensed hesitation from his son. And on the drive home, Randall admitted to his father that his entire life he personally felt that hesitation from everyone around him. That he had always felt a little out of place and off balance. I sat there in the living room with my black husband and our mixed daughter playing on the floor and felt the most absolute peace.

We clearly have different circumstances from Randall’s character because of many factors, but it was so good to see this episode and find understanding in that need to feel like you belong. I have felt that precise needed feeling of belonging in my home. With all our mixed races. Because at the time of this, we also had three international, male teenage students living with us as well (from China and Spain). We have this beautiful blend of culture and color in our home, resonating through our lives. I couldn’t help but feel like I never wanted my kids to feel like Randall felt in that episode. I never want them to feel out of place. And I believe that is why my husband and I try to foster a culture in our home of what we want our family life to look like.

My Interracial Marriage & Our Family Together | Twin Cities Moms Blog{Photo credit: My Darling Depictions}

We purposefully live in a city that is extremely diverse. Our neighborhood is filled with different cultures. Our church is an amazing blend of people from all different backgrounds and nationalities. No matter where we go, we are surrounded with diversity and so, for our kids, that is their normal. It is one thing I am so grateful for in our lives. They get to experience Liberian food from my mother-in-love and try more German and Swedish dishes from my mom. We have already learned so much about culture in China and Spain because of our international students. There is a melting pot of the world right in our own home.

My husband and I see each other for who we truly are. When we are out and about and notice heads turning our way, we have to remind ourselves that we aren’t the most ordinary looking family because of our different skin tones, and yes… because there are so freakin’ many of us. But in our home, we are just the Yancy’s. We are home when we are together. Our togetherness is our belonging. We create this home. We feel that comfort and that connection. Our incredible different shades of melanin-saturated skin don’t create barriers in our marriage. Because we choose this love and this life. 

My Interracial Marriage & Our Family Together | Twin Cities Moms Blog{Photo credit: My Darling Depictions}

Being in an interracial marriage brings its own societal assumptions and stereotypes, but I love this man. He is a good, good man. And falls in love with me when I sing “If You Like Pina Coladas” at the top of my lungs with the windows down. He keeps giving me all these babies. He rejoices with me. He comforts me when I cry. He is my other puzzle piece. The world might see him as a black man and me as white woman. To me, he is my darling husband. 

2 Responses to My Interracial Marriage & Our Family Together

  1. Kami | Life with Kami January 19, 2018 at 6:55 AM #

    Meghan you are truly an inspiration. For the last year I’ve known you on social media and getting to know your beautiful family, it’s been inspiring. Once I met you in person I realized you are very real and very much the positive, humble and down to earth woman I see every day in my social feed. Your love for your family shines through your kids eyes. God Bless.

  2. Jebeh Edmunds January 20, 2018 at 7:43 AM #

    Meghan, you are truly an inspiration! I’m also married, Liberian, and married to a Scandinavian man! I also have a blog called http://www.mommiesinblackandwhite.com and I’m sure your husband and I are cousins. My grandmother was a Yancy

    Hugs,
    Jebeh Edmunds

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